Music/hifi related jokes

[slinger]

I should state hear and now that most of these were gleaned from trawling the web...

A wife asks her husband, "Honey, if I died, would you remarry?"
After a considerable period of grieving, I guess I would. We all need companionship.
If I died and you remarried," the wife asks, "would she live in this house?"
We've spent a lot of money getting this house just the way we want it. I'm not going to get rid of my house. I guess she would.
If I died and you remarried, and she lived in this house," the wife asks, would she sleep in our bed?
Well, the bed is brand new, and it cost us $2,000. It's going to last a long time, so I guess she would.
If I died and you remarried, and she lived in this house and slept in our bed, would you play her our favorite records on the hi-fi in our loungeroom?
Oh, no," the husband replies. "She hates Opera.

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Rap is to music as Etch-A-Sketch is to art

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How many audiophiles does it take to change a light bulb? Three. One to change the light bulb and two to get very excited about the upgrade

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I apologise for this one, but postcards like these were a part of my youth...

[Daniel Quinn]

Nothing wrong with a saucy postcard .

[jammy395]

"Knock Knock"

"Whos there"

"Marco"

"Marco who"

"WTF do you mean "Marco who", you fukin moron, tiz I the great and wonderful one, the one with the Ego the size of a planet, and an aversion for anything sensible, I will see you banned at dawn for this you fukin lowlife peasant......




Fuk im bored......

[Dr Bunsen Honeydew]

"Knock Knock"

"Whos there"

"Marco"

"Marco who"

"WTF do you mean "Marco who", you fukin moron, tiz I the great and wonderful one, the one with the Ego the size of a planet, and an aversion for anything sensible, I will see you banned for this you fukin lowlife peasant......




Fuk im bored......

A Jammy classic, all it needed was piss-monkey

[jammy395]

A Jammy classic, all it needed was piss-monkey (Doc).

Sorted....

[Andrew]

That monkey is your signature, Jammy. It doubles the hilarity of your posts, which are already the best and funniest on here IMO. BTW those cables you sent me are utterly luvverly with or without the monkey

[terrybooth]

Nothing wrong with a saucy postcard .

As the actress said to the Bishop.

[Oldpinkman]

The three remaining members of Pink Floyd are involved in a car crash and all three die. They are standing in front of the Pearly Gates when St. Peter comes up and says, ''Oh, Hi guys! We've been expecting you. Your really going to love it here, this is a great place and did you know that we even have our own band? We have Elvis Presley singing, Hendrix is playing guitar, Sinatra is on piano and Roger Waters, your old bandmate, is writing lyrics for us!'' David Gilmour replies, ''Roger is here? When did he die?'' St. Peter leans over and whispers in his ear. ''It's really God, but he thinks he's Roger Waters!''

[Daniel Quinn]

[jammy395]

How many Marco's does it take to change a lightbulb?

Only one, He just holds the lightbulb up and the world revolves around him.