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Re: Bloody weather

Posted: Fri May 21, 2021 8:42 am
by CN211276
If it were not for the long hours of day light I would swear it is November. :lol:

Re: Bloody weather

Posted: Fri May 21, 2021 9:06 am
by karatestu
It has gone from one extreme to the other. Very dry and now for the last few weeks rain, rain, rain. As a part time farmer I am not adverse to moaning about the weather :grin:

Re: Bloody weather

Posted: Fri May 21, 2021 9:37 am
by Lindsayt
My dream is to have a farm in Wales. It would be the best farm ever. It'd be a highly modified farm. One where I spent more on the modifications than on the farm itself. It would be the size of a large broom cupboard, but that wouldn't matter.

And then I'd go on farming forums and dissect the personalities of everyone that disagreed with my farming methods.
And I'd send the odd box of manure to those that annoyed me the most. Just to help them along and to educate them. :animals-cow:

Re: Bloody weather

Posted: Sun May 23, 2021 7:28 am
by Wonfor14
My Rhubarb is wearing a life jacket, and the bloody snails are joining the Olympic Swimming team, but in my swimming trunk with a sponge a walking stick, bucket I can clean the car without driving the car of the drive, and I get a free shower and rinse. Cool, well no bloody freezing.

Re: Bloody weather

Posted: Sun May 23, 2021 10:26 am
by karatestu
Lindsayt wrote: Fri May 21, 2021 9:37 am My dream is to have a farm in Wales. It would be the best farm ever. It'd be a highly modified farm. One where I spent more on the modifications than on the farm itself. It would be the size of a large broom cupboard, but that wouldn't matter.

And then I'd go on farming forums and dissect the personalities of everyone that disagreed with my farming methods.
And I'd send the odd box of manure to those that annoyed me the most. Just to help them along and to educate them. :animals-cow:
We would so envy your wonderful lifestyle. We would pay good money to see your pimped up farm, yes indeed. We wouldn't argue with you about farming though incase you banned us from your lovely farm. Your farm means more to us than our miserable little lives. We have never seen such a flock of subservient sheep. You must be very proud.

P.S We observe that you have been eating very wellof late. Fattening up is very much an important part of farming and you are leading an excellent example in that regard.

Our endless gratitude :bow-yellow: :bow-yellow: :bow-yellow: :bow-yellow: :bow-yellow: :bow-yellow:

PPS Although we know you know where we live, we do not quite understand the term " c*nt kicked in " Please could your holiness educate us on this matter.

PPPS Shit is a very important part of farming. :grin: As you have already pointed out , your bullshit is the best there is and we your faithful flock all agree :dance: But we are however a little bit concerned that you have a new high capacity muck spreader and have started spreading your modified bullshit on the Perfect Farming Monthly forum (that trade shilling publication known as PFM which is an equally interesting read as that other fine farming publication, Farmers Weekly).

We really enjoy the threads "dung heap pics 2021" and "reader's wives ". There are some classic, vintage piles of shit on there which the owners must be very proud of if they have gone to the trouble of posting lovely pics of it. We note that the well known and respected member of High Farming Society (HFS) know as antonio66 has been liking a lot of the dung heaps posted therein. We would advise that the most natural organic dung heaps are to be found on the respected High Farming Society site. Why anyone would feel the need to look at second rate dung heaps on Perfect Farming Monthly we don't really know.

You thought we had forgotten about reader's wives :lol: The farming enthusiast can find it very hard to find a life partner. Often they tell themselves they are not interested in such things and lead a solitary, sad life and have to amuse themselves with copious amounts of diy 8-) Then there are the farming enthusiasts who like their stock a little bit too much :shock: :shock: And don't forget the ones in denial .

Who's got the biggest, most expensive tractor. This gets played out on lots of forums. You just have to have a John Deene else your street cred is shot to pieces and we can't be having that. Then there are the modified tractors which the owners are extremely proud of having spent stupid amounts of money on them. The terms sow's ear and turd polishing spring to mind.

Value for money has almost been forgotten about and us farming types are usually very adept with this. We seem to have lost our way and forgotten our tight fisted, tighter than a duck's arse in water ideals. If in such a predicament I would suggest consulting with the popular small holding enthusiast LindsayT.

Re: Bloody weather

Posted: Sun May 23, 2021 12:02 pm
by Grumpytim
:naughty: :clap: You're both very very naughty boys :clap:

Re: Bloody weather

Posted: Sun May 23, 2021 12:35 pm
by CN211276
I regained access to the farm with a new email address. Have not entered as the smell is a bit off putting. :lol:

Re: Bloody weather

Posted: Sun May 23, 2021 12:47 pm
by karatestu
Grumpytim wrote: Sun May 23, 2021 12:02 pm :naughty: :clap: You're both very very naughty boys :clap:
Who me ? :grin:

Whilst out driving my pimped up John Deere I noticed how the other farming enthusiasts in the area were envying my wheels 8-) They really do love me and my lifestyle although they wouldn't admit it. Just you wait til I see them in that popular farming enthusiast meeting place otherwise known as the tap room of the Boot & Shoe. I will be sure to get the last word and they will be proven wrong on all subjects, especially how much better a pimped tractor is than the original even though you need to spend several times the new retail price to achieve this excellence and only the air suspension seat remains of the original and that is only because nobody is willing to make a better one and fleece me of several thousand pounds ( which I didn't earn by the way).

Re: Bloody weather

Posted: Sun May 23, 2021 1:25 pm
by karatestu
CN211276 wrote: Sun May 23, 2021 12:35 pm I regained access to the farm with a new email address. Have not entered as the smell is a bit off putting. :lol:
That'll be the three turds daily section :lol:

Re: Bloody weather

Posted: Mon May 24, 2021 12:28 am
by antonio66
Will farmers still be getting the Govt handouts now we are no longer in the EEC?