Did You Shit Yourself?

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savvypaul
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Did You Shit Yourself?

Unread post by savvypaul »

When we were born, we were unaware of the idea that we don't have to shit, involuntarily, at any given moment. But, we were trained, and we learnt, that we could choose when to shit. And, yet, the world is full of grown adults shitting their pants, in public, on a daily basis.

I watched England's dramatic semi-final win against Denmark on Wednesday night. In the past, England would have crumbled. But the manager, and the team, chose not to shit themselves. They have developed a respect for each other based on understanding and celebration of what we have in common while also respecting and valuing difference. Can we claim the same 'clean pair of pants' for the fans who booed the Danish national anthem and the taking of the knee?

How often have you instantly reacted to a Facebook post and then realised (or been told) that the post is several years old? How often have you succumbed to an instant emotional reaction without knowing any of the complexities that inevitably exist around an issue? I know I've done that more than once. I know it was my choice to do so, and I've learnt that it's my choice not to do so. I don't have to shit my pants in public. A few weeks ago, a friend shared a 'meme' that compared WW2 veterans marching down Whitehall to a BLM march down the same street. You already know the punchline. I asked my friend, who I love and respect very much, what value he thought that the original poster of that meme was bringing to the world. Does our love for one group of people have to be at the expense of another group? Is life really a zero sum game?

When Lindsay suggested, at The WAM, that he would exhibit at Kegworth if a reduced cost day-only rate could be accommodated, the shitting of pants was instant and widespread. 'An insult to the good members of the WAM and an existential threat to the whole show'. No recognition of Lindsay's contribution to the WAM over many years, no mention of the years when he exhibited at Scalford, no understanding that Lindsay is someone who has contributed his time to many bake-offs. Numbers for the show in October are looking difficult. What was more of a threat...Lindsay's different view of affordability or the instant emotional incontinence that shuts down ideas? Why wouldn't we want an enthusiast show to be as inclusive as it possibly could be? Lindsay described the episode as an 'interesting psychological experiment'...a reaction which appears, to me, to be an excellent example of NOT shitting yourself.

When I did the 'Hi-Fi Foo Fight' blog, there were just a few people who complained that they were offended, either for themselves, or on behalf of others. I suggested that best way not to be offended, was to choose not to be offended. Your offense is your choice, not mine. I was hoping you might have a laugh...at yourself, or at me. It must be a miserable, shitty world where you can't laugh at yourself.

Most recently, I was pleased to receive an apology from Alan (firebottle) about his BMU postings, and I was pleased that Oliver (bigman80) chose to delete the thread from his forum. I'd have been more pleased if they had chosen to speak with me first, of course. Thinking before you shit can save a lot of hassle, but more importantly it can engender honesty, mutual respect and understanding. In the great scheme of things, I have no axe to grind with either of them; they are hi-fi enthusiasts. They both still have membership, here. Even the HFS member who declared at AOS that “Jesus fucking wept! You could destroy earth with that thing” still has membership here. We'll post you a new pair of Calvin Kleins, Shane.

The upside of not shitting your pants in public is not just a reduction in laundry bills. By choosing not to shit ourselves we open ourselves to understanding of others, self-awareness and new opportunities. I find that people who are able to choose not to shit themselves are more worthwhile to listen to. They tend to have ideas and attitudes that go beyond the obvious, and often beyond what has already gone before.

Social media has the potential to be a 'world wide web' of understanding and learning...when we have learnt not to shit ourselves.
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Re: Did You Shit Yourself?

Unread post by CycleCoach »

Well put Savvy.
It's interesting how social media seems to be able to push the "emotional overreaction button" in so many people so easily, (and often instantly.) We've all been there, but as you so succinctly put it - not enough of us take a step back and a deep breath before diving in headlong. Food for thought.
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Re: Did You Shit Yourself?

Unread post by slinger »

It should probably be noted that even birds - many steps below (some of) us on the evolutionary ladder - know not to shit in their own nests.
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Re: Did You Shit Yourself?

Unread post by Grumpytim »

slinger wrote: Fri Jul 09, 2021 2:15 pm It should probably be noted that even birds - many steps below (some of) us on the evolutionary ladder - know not to shit in their own nests.
However they do poo in their communal bird baths, well at least ours do, others may be more socially aware.

That said I think a lot of the issue is remoteness, most of the nastiness you see would never ever (well only very rarely by complete head cases) be said to that person or group face to face. When I started work I was always taught that whilst letters were a good way of stating your co's position, if you want to negotiate and actually do a deal, fix a problem etc then either get on the phone or go and see the other party. More often than not getting the two parties into the same room was 75% of getting the deal done, people who would be very erudite and irascible on paper would more often than not turn out to be relatively reasonable in real life and a deal could usually be done. The flip side being that if you hit a brick wall at that stage you knew it was time to really go tot the trenches.

The good thing about the olden days and letter writing was that it could never really be a knee jerk reaction, you had time to ponder your response whilst checking for typos, now of course you just hit send, like I'm just about to do.
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Re: Did You Shit Yourself?

Unread post by savvypaul »

Here's another good example of NOT shitting your pants...

https://audio-talk.co.uk/phpBB3/viewtop ... f=9&t=8220
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Re: Did You Shit Yourself?

Unread post by Mississippi Blind Child Assburn »

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Re: Did You Shit Yourself?

Unread post by Lindsayt »

I'm not sure I'd describe it as shitting yourself. I'd describe it more of having knee-jerk reaction. Or having an overly emotional reaction.

As for the Wam thread on this years show and the general response that I got when I mentioned that I'd be happy to exhibit for £10, and that I missed the old days when I could do so. My feelings on that are that I don't mind having forceful and emotion filled arguments with people. As long as it doesn't descend into ad hominem / personal insults / using dirty tricks to undermine what the other person is saying.

I was taken-aback at how forthright the responses to my comments on the show on that Wam thread were. And I was personally disappointed that the general response was focused on money money money.
And that the way the show is being organised is seen as a sacred cow. Something not to be questioned nor criticised. Not even indirectly.

But hey, that discussion is all water under the bridge now. Everyone that helps to organise the show and that exhibits at the show has my gratitude.

As for the thread linked to in the linked thread (Chineses whispers going on here) I can imagine the sort of response that Richard Dunn would have made to it. :angry-screaming:

We can all have our own thoughts on the psychology behind this thread, the linked thread and the linked linked thread...

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Re: Did You Shit Yourself?

Unread post by Daniel Quinn »

Problem is people reply to the poster not the post. Lyndsey is hated by the shortsighted Wammer's and firebottle wouldn't have done what he did if he couldn't score points over a dead man. Although the doc can't trump being alive, so I'd thought firebottle would have been satisfied.

I used to just ignore everybody and reply to posts , I only notice who posted once I had replied. Although it can backfire, I was once very mean to Colin wonfour in his TQ days .

Karma got me , because 2 years later I also had asphasia .

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Re: Did You Shit Yourself?

Unread post by savvypaul »

Lindsayt wrote: Fri Jul 09, 2021 6:40 pm I'm not sure I'd describe it as shitting yourself. I'd describe it more of having knee-jerk reaction. Or having an overly emotional reaction.

As for the Wam thread on this years show and the general response that I got when I mentioned that I'd be happy to exhibit for £10, and that I missed the old days when I could do so. My feelings on that are that I don't mind having forceful and emotion filled arguments with people. As long as it doesn't descend into ad hominem / personal insults / using dirty tricks to undermine what the other person is saying.

I was taken-aback at how forthright the responses to my comments on the show on that Wam thread were. And I was personally disappointed that the general response was focused on money money money.
And that the way the show is being organised is seen as a sacred cow. Something not to be questioned nor criticised. Not even indirectly.

But hey, that discussion is all water under the bridge now. Everyone that helps to organise the show and that exhibits at the show has my gratitude.

As for the thread linked to in the linked thread (Chineses whispers going on here) I can imagine the sort of response that Richard Dunn would have made to it. :angry-screaming:

We can all have our own thoughts on the psychology behind this thread, the linked thread and the linked linked thread...
Knee reflex is physically desirable and involuntary. Shitting in public is undesirable and completely avoidable.

Yes. I too, hope the WAM show does well.
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Re: Did You Shit Yourself?

Unread post by BadgerBeerIsBest »

Due to my sheltered upbringing and continuing naivety I had to google what WAM meant, the Urban Dictionary said it was:-

Wet And Messy sex. Describes a fetish of sorts that envolves getting covered with some form of goopy messy substance.
Am I on the right track?
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