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Re: A message of support

Posted: Tue Apr 13, 2021 8:26 pm
by savvypaul
karatestu wrote: Tue Apr 13, 2021 5:10 pm I am humbled by all your kind replies. Thanks.

I have been here before so know how this plays out. The straws pile up on the camel's back until it just takes one more to break it. I fail to see there is a problem until my mind blows, I just assume it is what everybody has to go through on a daily basis and that I am being pathetic. Try to act like everything is normal until I can't hide it anymore.
That's just an opportunity for a reset.

And, it only happens because you are conscientious and caring.

Definitely nothing to criticise in any of that.

Re: A message of support

Posted: Wed Apr 14, 2021 2:05 pm
by antonio66
Plug and Play always sounds good to me Stu. :grin:
Just wishing you well, you'll get over this :dance:

Re: A message of support

Posted: Wed Apr 14, 2021 2:27 pm
by SteveTheShadow
savvypaul wrote: Tue Apr 13, 2021 8:26 pm
....And, it only happens because you are conscientious and caring....
Tell me about it. :roll:

I’ve been there, on the point of ending it all at one point, and all because of some stupid bloody job and the bunch of arseholes that were in charge. I came back from it with help from those closest to me and a good professional. Problem us men have, is that many of us can’t or won’t ask for help until it is almost too late: we feel it makes us less of a man because we can’t cope. I’m here to tell you that you’re more of a man if you admit to yourself that you are stuck, trapped or whatever you want to call it and get the help you need.

Living with a depressed person is horrendous. Being a depressed person is even worse, so the depressed person owes it to themselves to get the help required. A great side effect is that you’ll be happier and as a result, so will your loved ones.


A great bit of karma from my situation was that 10 years down the line from my aborted attempt on my own life, the aforementioned arseholes got themselves a nice inadequate rating from OFSTED and disappeared off the radar. I can’t tell you how happy that made me. :lol:

Re: A message of support

Posted: Wed Apr 14, 2021 2:36 pm
by CycleCoach
Well said Steve

Re: A message of support

Posted: Sat Apr 24, 2021 7:26 pm
by karatestu
Just back from a walk in the lovely sunshine with my dear wife, son and daughter. It really lifted my spirits looking at the flora and fauna, wildlife doing it's thing. We had a bit of a laugh as well when my son (11) asked me what moobs were. How we laughed and when I explained my daughter (7) said "I didn't know men had boobs daddy" :lol: :lol: :lol:

These little moments remind me why it's good to be alive. And music ofc as well as HFS :guiness; Sipping a Pimms now, it must be summer :dance:

Re: A message of support

Posted: Sat Apr 24, 2021 8:03 pm
by CN211276
Walks do uplift your spirits in troubled times. Also had a nice walk in glorious sunshine with family as an escape from the recent bereavement and streamed lock down red list funeral from thousands of miles away.

Came back to see a delayed recording of a race where I had a few quid on a 8/1 winner. Celebrating now. :guiness;

Re: A message of support

Posted: Sat May 15, 2021 12:48 pm
by karatestu
I'm starting to come out of this downer now :dance:

I have stopped looking at so much schiit on the internet which has helped. In fact time spent staring at a tablet has decreased markedly :grin: I have given up looking at other forums apart from this one and a quick scan through PFM for interesting topics but they are mostly a rehash of the same old same old. Very rarely does something come up that justifies looking. Plus I am not a part of the Tannoy appreciation society :grin:

Started reading books again :dance: instead of bollox on the internet. Last one was The Children of Hurin by JRR Hartley. Engrossed. Also playing more games with my kids.

Now the biggie. During the worst of Coronavirus and other troubles, my drinking stretched between Wednesday and Saturday nights. Dropped Wednesdays a long while back. Thursday was always band practice night and I would have a few then. No band practice for over a year but I carried on with the drinking at home.

Four weeks ago the wife and I knocked Thursday on the head and felt much better for it. Two weeks ago we went a step further and stopped the Friday night drinking as well :shock: :shock: :shock: I have more or less got pissed every Fri and Sat night for the last 27 years :shock: Stopping on a Friday has been quite a big thing psychologically but I have done it. Never felt better on a Saturday for a long time.

So I am left with Saturday night to drink until I drop, which just happens to be tonight :dance: Ten cans of larger, lots of music on google music and a book (whilst I can still see it). My wife said she won't carry me to bed though.

Re: A message of support

Posted: Sat May 15, 2021 5:26 pm
by CN211276
Glad things are picking up for you Stu. The cans of lager are quite a lot. I have been drinking more at home since Covid, but it is not more than two or three cans/bottles of beer a day. I don't drink anything a couple of days a week. Prior to Covid when I was going out I would often drink more in a day than I do in a week now. Drinking at home tends to send me to sleep. :lol:

The start os some sort of return to normality, Indian varient permitting, is on the cards with my second jab on Monday, restrictions being lifted and a friends retirement drink up at the end of the month. Have not been in a pub since my birthday, the one before the last one. All in all the past forteen months have been amongst the most miserable of my life. Music at home as never been more important and a god send.

Re: A message of support

Posted: Sat May 15, 2021 5:46 pm
by karatestu
CN211276 wrote: Sat May 15, 2021 5:26 pm Glad things are picking up for you Stu. The cans of lager are quite a lot. I have been drinking more at home since Covid, but it is not more than two or three cans/bottles of beer a day. I don't drink anything a couple of days a week. Prior to Covid when I was going out I would often drink more in a day than I do in a week now. Drinking at home tends to send me to sleep. :lol:

The start os some sort of return to normality, Indian varient permitting, is on the cards with my second jab on Monday, restrictions being lifted and a friends retirement drink up at the end of the month. Have not been in a pub since my birthday, the one before the last one. All in all the past forteen months have been amongst the most miserable of my life. Music at home as never been more important and a god send.
Thanks Clive. Yes 10 is a lot, I will probably do about eight. One usually lasts about half an hour and I just had my first mouthful so if I go to bed at 10.30 then that will be 10 :shock: I will try and be good :pray: As I am only drinking one night a week now I expect my tolerance will drop (hopefully) so I won't drink as much.

The only pubs I would go to are the Sam Smiths around here- I only live five miles from Sam Smiths, John Smith's and Coors breweries (used to be Bass). I can afford to drink in a Sam's pub but refuse to pay the prices in others. Yes, I'm a Yorkshire farner :lol:

The bands I am in are the thing that I miss the most, can't wait to get them going again and watch some very drunk people at weddings whilst playing. Sometimes the entertainment they provide is priceless and very funny. Get to look at some pretty ladies strutting their stuff right in front of me. Makes the world go round :dance:

Re: A message of support

Posted: Sat May 15, 2021 9:55 pm
by Fretless
Looks like a case of quality over quantity, Stu.

Just take good care of yourself - and those around you.