HiFi Subjectivist ¦ Audio Forum ¦ NVA User Group

I just realised what I wrote If you hadn't guessed it, this post is a moan. I have not gad the pleasure of using some of these services for a while. It's not every day that your mother dies.

Worst offender has been the local doctors closely followed by North Yorkshire Council. Fuck me, these guys really know how to rake something relatively simple and make it complicated . And then completely fuck it up and not even care.. it makes me want to go work for a charity where I can help people in need. Jesus, it's bloody hard work.

Before covid doctors voted not to do home visits because it took up too much time. Fair enough but who gets sent out to patient's homes now ? A paramedic. When it came to certifying the death my mum's doctor had to get the ok from the coroner because she had jot actually seen her for over three years. Then the paperwork she sent to the registrar was not accepted.

I'm about to join my mum and lose the will to live. Do government departments attract thick people with no empathy ? Tick. In the private sector you can't get away with such a lack of motivation. Being self employed I know the buck stops with me, there is nowhere to hide and I can't blame it on someone else.

Rant over.

Title has typo's and I can't work out how to fix (yes I am thick)

karatestu wrote: ↑Sat Jul 23, 2022 6:58 am Title has typo's and I can't work out how to fix (yes I am thick)

Is that better, Stu?

karatestu wrote: ↑Sat Jul 23, 2022 6:39 am I just realised what I wrote If you hadn't guessed it, this post is a moan. I have not gad the pleasure of using some of these services for a while. It's not every day that your mother dies.

Worst offender has been the local doctors closely followed by North Yorkshire Council. Fuck me, these guys really know how to rake something relatively simple and make it complicated . And then completely fuck it up and not even care.. it makes me want to go work for a charity where I can help people in need. Jesus, it's bloody hard work.

Before covid doctors voted not to do home visits because it took up too much time. Fair enough but who gets sent out to patient's homes now ? A paramedic. When it came to certifying the death my mum's doctor had to get the ok from the coroner because she had jot actually seen her for over three years. Then the paperwork she sent to the registrar was not accepted.

I'm about to join my mum and lose the will to live. Do government departments attract thick people with no empathy ? Tick. In the private sector you can't get away with such a lack of motivation. Being self employed I know the buck stops with me, there is nowhere to hide and I can't blame it on someone else.

Rant over.

Stu, the registrar has a job to do, he or she will need the correct information from the doctor before you can make an appointment. Hospital doctors have more experience of filling in the forms than family GPs. Give her a break, she probably doesn't do this very often for someone she hasn't seen for a while. You will soon have sympathy for her because you have a lot of form filling to come. People hate filling in forms, with good reason, some of them can be very poorly organised.

When you go to the registrar have all the information required, in the correct order, printed out and sitting in front of you. If you have Birth and Marriage certificates take them, or copies, with you. It can take quite a while with the registrar but being prepared will minimise the time taken. The registrar will really appreciate your being prepared.

Having designed forms, legal documents at that, I know a bit about forms and I also know that getting things wrong is an absolute pain. Government employees aren't "thick" and don't "lack empathy", they are trying to get it right first time so that you can get on with what you have to do. If they had to keep coming back to you to correct mistakes you would have reason to be annoyed. The registrar is employed by the council by the way.

Now, take a deep breath, look at the web sites and make a list of what each department wants, gather the information, in the correct order and then you will be ready to deal with each one as quickly and easily as possible. It is all in the preparation, just like everything else you do.

My mum passed on 21 years ago and procedures were definitely more straightforward then.

Firstly I'm very sorry to hear about your Mum passing.

Secondly I'd echo what Geoff said above.

Thirdly I'm sure you're already aware of this facility, but just in case you aren't, this is very useful - I know I've used it relatively recently.

https://www.gov.uk/after-a-death/organi ... ll-us-once

Plus if you have a tame solicitor I'd also talk to them about the pitfalls surrounding probate - there are many I'm afraid.

Grumpytim wrote: ↑Sat Jul 23, 2022 11:45 am Firstly I'm very sorry to hear about your Mum passing.

Secondly I'd echo what Geoff said above.

Thirdly I'm sure you're already aware of this facility, but just in case you aren't, this is very useful - I know I've used it relatively recently.

https://www.gov.uk/after-a-death/organi ... ll-us-once

Plus if you have a tame solicitor I'd also talk to them about the pitfalls surrounding probate - there are many I'm afraid.

100% agree about the tame solicitor, mine has been vey helpful. The best advice was “you don’t need a solicitor if it is simple”. My friend isn’t working as a solicitor so his advice is free.

Your local Citizen's Advice Bureau can also be a great resource, and +1 on that link Tim posted. I used it when Jeanette died, and it does help with the paperwork hassle.

I have been unfair to these people during my grief. I am much more able to deal with it as each day passes. Registrar appointment is tomorrow as time is running out. They will do the tell us once thing with us apparently. Funeral is more or less sorted.

Tell us once is something you do online, the registrar simply gives you a login. It is very easy so don’t worry about that.